MERRY CHRISTMAS!

It’s an oh-so-odd Christmas season in the Buddhist land of relentless humid heat. Until this week, I really didn’t give Christmas a spare thought. But I found myself at a Thai Christian Christmas fiesta on Sunday, which inspired me to teach my students all about the Christmas story this week. We are also listening to Jingle Bells & Joy to the World and playing Christmas Jeopardy, which includes a BABY JESUS category. Our big Christmas assembly is tomorrow and I am spearheading an ALL-SCHOOL GAME. 10 minutes of utter chaos with 1,500 Thai teenagers. Mai Bpen Rai.

I’m Christmas-ing in Si Satchanalai, Sukhothai with eight fellow Fulbrighters. It won’t be American Christmas style, it won’t be Luke 2 Christmas style, and it won’t be family Christmas style…but it will be eight Americans in Thailand Christmas style.

Thai Christian Christmas Fiesta

My Thai pastor entreated me to abandon church before it even started on Sunday and drive out to, as he put it, “the son church” of this “father church.” The son church was sponsoring a community-wide Christmas service. (Success! I’m a little Thai church ambassador already.)

One can’t expect much in Thailand, but what I definitely didn’t even think about (not) expecting was cramming into the back seat of the car with three elderly Thai women. Another of their cohort sat in front after I absolutely refused that auspicious seat. The women huffed and puffed up into the SUV on the arm of the most sincere pastor. These tiny, withered, holy creatures – who had most magnificent hands – squished together clutching their Bibles. I couldn’t contain frequent bursts of laughter during the 20-kilo drive.

My adorably ancient but assertive seatmates conferred amongst themselves about how to best elicit personal information from me. But it was I who found out the best personal information of all – one of the women rides her bike 30 kilometers to church every Sunday. She’s 86 years old and bikes 30 kilos each way! I have so much to learn in life.

The “son church” building was smaller, but the sheep were more plentiful! Representatives from churches around Uttaradit came to worship, sing, and give gifts. (For those curious about Uttaradit Province deets, while we drove through the neighboring LapLae district to church, I realized that LapLae is the most bustling district of Uttaradit.) Twenty-five children pranced about before the service in the yard but exhibited the most admirable service etiquette: my new three (much younger) seatmates shushed me when I asked what page to turn to.

Even so, the children became my Thai-church-survival guides. Before the service, they drilled me for a good 20 minutes in Thai reading, and they guided me silently through the bulletin during the service, evaluating my literacy progress. My progress: not noteworthy. The service reminded me of home, mainly because children performed an interpretive Christmas dance alternating between smirking, laughing, and sincerity. Three kids sang “We Wish You a Merry Christmas” and forced the congregation to follow along in English, which was my moment of glory.

Thai peeps love giving presents in the most mundane of times, so Christmas is a legit present mudslide for Thai Christians. They sporadically gave presents throughout the service. The elders all received two brooms, which is either a tradition that entirely went over my head…or not a tradition?

Apparently someone drew names from a basket to award presents. I definitely never put my name in that basket, but they managed – in Thai hospitality style – to call my name anyhow. I actually understood their Thai as they beckoned me forward, but I faked cluelessness for two reasons: 1) Grengjai, or the feeling of indebtedness, and 2) the knowledge that if I was wrong about getting a gift, it could be rawwwther embarrassing. So I waited it out like a deer in the headlights until my three drill sergeant babies straight up pushed me off the bench. And guess what the good people of Uttaradit gave the pet farang girl – toilet paper and a flowery plate! They rightly supposed that if they’re going to give out toilet paper, they might as well give it to the squat toilet skeptic.

We feasted afterward – peeps love their food around here. Before the adorable ancients quizzed me in all things Me on the ride home, ten women jointly gifted me an enormous amount of local fruit dessert.

MERRY CHRISTMAS!

***An unnecessary word about Thai church makeshift pews – I think they are wooden bus station benches. Remind me about this if I ever need to furnish a church.

Adventures in Reading

Step 1) Bike down the road.

Step 2) See a good place to read in a field, often under a bamboo hut intended for lunch breaks.

Step 3) Crawl under wire fence.

Step 4) Lift bikes over wire fence.

Step 5) Watch out for snakes.

Step 6) Read in a field.

Our most recent haunt.

Tropical Treats

There ain't nothing like (/more incapacitating than) eating 3 deep fried bananas two days in a row.


Karen priming the first batch.


Just the beginning of a two hour meal...

You don't know what you got 'til it's gone

Things I didn't appreciate enough in my previous life:

Bleach
Ziploc bags
Bleach
Window screens
Bleach
Sidewalks
Bleach
Ticky tac
Bleach
Bugs traps and mouse traps
Bleach
Living mold-free
Bleach
Sinks
Bleach
Constant supply of water

A Glimpse of the Face of God

Ministry of presence has to do with risk. Your most precious gift to give is you. You have come far or near to 'give' to the girls and boys. You may have thought that what you had to give them was your knowledge, your medical supplies, the benefit of your teaching skills, or your money. I challenge you to realize that what you have to give, the most important gift, is the gift of your time, your interest, your laughter and your love. It is the gift, the sacrifice of self....Let her know you need her, are learning from her, appreciate her, and are receiving encouragement and joy from her.

- Courtesy of Bogue family reading

Ministry is, first of all, receiving God's blessings from those to whom we minister. What is this blessing? It is a glimpse of the face of God. Seeing God is what heaven is all about! We can see God in the face of Jesus, and we can see the face of Jesus in all those who need our care...We so much need a blessing. The poor are waiting to bless us.

- Henri Nouwen

A beautiful evening spent with Karen - my Chinese teacher friend (nothing to do with the above picture) - singing, playing the keyboard we swiped from the music room, and loving on Jesus. I witnessed Karen's baptism last Sunday. Precious daughter of God. So good of Jesus to place me in the middle of nowhere in a Buddhist country next door to a girl my age who is seeking His face for the first time.

Affection

Gift is the sweet 14-year-old girl who lives with me, someone between an adopted sister, mom, and daughter. Tonight, she held my hand for two hours all through the market.

It is unclear who led who. Actually, it is pretty clear. I already have quite the reputation for being an incredibly meandering wanderer and shopper, so she didn't want to lose me at any cost.

In class this afternoon, two of my boys, one who wears a leather jacket and both of whom are always doing their own thing, perfecting the boys-who-sit-in-the-back routine, were called on to converse aloud. They began the assigned conversation with the following:

Boy 1: Hello.
Boy 2: Hello.
Boy 1: I love you.
Boy 2: I love you too.

I just about died. I then explained that I had only written that exchange on the board (which they were reading, as they couldn't be bothered to write anything in their notebooks or pay detailed attention) as a joke because another boy had said "I love you" aloud to me before I wrote "How are you?/I am happy."

The boys hung their heads in absolute humiliation. It was a glorious moment.

Chaperoning My Lovely Naklian in Chiang Mai

On Thursday, my school made an incredibly questionable decision when they let me (Yim) chaperone the "science" field trip to Chiang Mai. I set off with 120 students - including those I have for biology - and 8 teachers at FOUR AM. We sang karaoke on the bus, suffered through me teaching "The Wheels on the Bus" song, got lectured at by science professors at a university, chilled at the gorgeous Queen Sirikit Botanical Gardens, and slept on the floor in cement rooms at a Chiang Mai Stadium. On Friday, we wandered through the local agricultural university's agricultural fair, which had no end of prizewinning plants, tractors, and rice harvester machines (though I seem to have come away with 2 pairs of flowery sandals and a kilo of Chinese oranges).

My students were enamored by the big city, and they took pictures and bought souvenirs left and right. It's quite possible that by "field trip," my school actually meant "shopping trip." But a good time was had by all whether we were taking pictures of KFC in the mall, eating at a Thai breakfast buffet (this was a big deal for my kids!), or actually mentioning science once or twice.

I will chronicle the moments that most stuck out to me while watching my students interact with Chiang Mai. After you grimace over my first world retainer, scroll down for some pictures of our trip.

• My girls brought buckets to shower with, not knowing if Chiang Mai had showers!
  

• I slept with 30 girls in a cement room on a long connected mat thing. In America, there's no way I would be asked to cuddle with my students all night, but cuddling, hugs, conniving, and kisses from my lovely Mathayom 4 (equivalent of 10th grade) girls ruled the night. I failed to enforce any rules, as it was just the students and me, so boys kept wandering in to eat and celebrate a birthday. I'm a terrible chaperone. I lost all zest for order when my girls explained quickly in Thai why they absolutely must let the boys inside despite it being midnight, and I found myself nodding my head in confusion, which was translated as "do whatever you want." I paid dearly for this approach when the girls woke me up at 4:30 AM. For them, that actually counted as sleeping in because some wake up at 4 AM on school days to travel to school.

• My girls expressed extreme confusion over the purpose of my retainer: "Teacher, why you taking your teeth?" First World Teeth.

• Each girl individually said her Buddhist prayers before sleeping.
  

• It's strange to sleep and brush teeth alongside the girls I teach. But I love the lack of barriers between students and teachers here - my students are not hesitant to say "I love you" and constantly hold my hand, kiss me goodbye, and, as they get more bold, come running at me for hugs in the mornings. There is little concept of personal space in Thailand, judging from the way female teachers constantly grab my waist from behind and hold my hand.

• In one sense, my girls are the most modest creatures in the world. They gasped when I started pulling on shorts under my skirt and changed in the 2 stalls, which took an eternity. In another sense, they are rather immodest, letting the boys into our room, asking me all manner of questions, etc.
  

• During the Thai science lecture on Thursday, I was rather tuned out, for obvious language-related reasons. All of a sudden, the entire room is staring at me. The professor in the front is clearly asking me a question, but her English is abominable. She eventually articulates "How many microorganisms?" Now, in my view, one of the key features of the population of microorganisms in this world is their tiny size that renders them rather uncountable. So assuming that the professor could not possibly have meant what she said, I clarified: "How many microorganisms are there in the WORLD?" She responded in the affirmative and told me that my students didn't know the answer. Confused to no end about the ridiculousness of this question, I took the English speaker's best way out: say a difficult word that your audience won't understand. So when she asked me for the 6th time, I responded with "Innumerable." This strategy works like a charm - she cocked her head and proceeded to ramble on in Thai.
  

Queen Sirikit Botanical Gardens with my biology students.


Due to our impatience with the garden tram, this gang and I commenced a walk up the mountain to the main gardens, but a work truck stopped and offered us a ride.


Aww, my Matayom 4 boys. So matchy and so excited about taking my picture every 20 seconds ( (but check out those universal smiles...I promise, the pic was their idea...they dragged me to and fro and wouldn't let me out of their sight for a good hour).


They want their own boy band.


Inside the greenhouses.




By the wax rose, which is an awesome plant.


With the Mathayom 1 babies.


Being hounded by the paparazzi (comprised of my students and everyone else touring the gardens).



Yellow roses at the gardens.

Birthday celebration! They all know I won't make them go to sleep, especially if there's cake involved. Unfortunately, this particular cake ended up all over this birthday boy's face in an odd attempt to impress his classmates and smear frosting all over them.


One of the sweet little Mathayom 1 girls (equivalent of 7th grade) who legitimately follows me around like a puppy.


Agricultural fair at Maejedol University (sp?) - check out the size of the fruit. This fair was very country fair-esque with competitions between plant sellers.

The King looking over the tractors in anticipation of his birthday (which is today).